I realized just how reclusive I have become. I barely talk to anyone. In my real life and on the computer. I have always been a girl who knows a lot of people, but open and close with only a select few. I still am like that, and if you think I can sure yap alot then you are one of those special few.
But I do not socialize anymore, at all I think. I don't make small talk, and I tend to keep myself very distant from most everyone. It is Rob, Ashlin and Colton who get the pleasure to listen to me everyday now. While I am sure that they fully FULLY enjoy it, I have lost touch with so many people. Most people are lucky if I say hi to them now. Isn't that just awful of me.
It made me really sad to come to this realization. I do enjoy my quiet time that is for sure, but this way I am is ridiculous! Part of it is because I am unhappy with how I look and a larger part of it is because I just don't have the energy to put out and go the extra few steps. When I am out usually my thoughts are finishing my errands and getting back home, not stopping to chat. I do go out with Rob for coffee still, it isn't like I never leave the house. But I tell ya I miss the old days when my girlfriends and I would go for dinner and sit and chat for hours! It is way different talking to a guy than talking away with your girls.
So the question is, now that I have come to my senses. What am I to do? Since I am just a stay at home mom now I don't really like I have a lot to offer anyone any more. I am sure that friends can only handle me talking about my kids, or heaven forbid, my mother!(ACK!) so much. And truth be told I just feel so shy now that I am not sure I can start being more social again, it just feels so awkward and uncommon for me.
I don't know.
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7 comments:
I would LOVE to go to dinner with you :)
Its really hard for me too Kathy!
I have lived in this town for 6 years, still don't know many poeple. Don't have a lot of "real life" friends.
My friends from high school/early 20s I see soooo rarely thats its just easier now not to see them!
Argh..... being a grown-up is hard work! lol
I did call a friend last time I was home and we went out with her and her husband and did have fun!
Good Luck to you :)
Ok, so how often have I said this to you? . . . I SO wish I lived closer!:)
Hang in there girl just try a little everyday!
you could always 'talk' to me... you do sometimes... but you could some more...
I treasure my online scrapping pals, but I feel totally blessed to have some REALLY good scrapping and non-scrapping friends who have been 'there' for me on numerous occasions - hope you strike a happy balance
Hoping you will have a way to meet some wonderful people you have something in common with. Reach out to your old friends too.. ya never know what youwill find to rekindle your friendships!!
Thinking of you sweetie! I tend to hide out at home and be like that a lot too.. it IS hard to get out of that mode.
La-
One step at a time.
And ditto what Stayce said :)
Love you and miss you.
And you better get on IM SOON!
hey lady!
me too! totally getting it- let's organize an online chat or something- coffee in hand, and we can all touch base again- I miss everyone too. The new year seems a great time to do it!
p.s. my blogs being re-started....miracles never cease!
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